Why Is Adulting So Hard?

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Shorter Version


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“You’re still a ‘Rockstar’ I whisper to myself as I take my multi-vitamin and get into bed at 9:00pm.”

~ Anonymous

Adulting Is Hard, But It Doesn’t Have to Be

When you’re an adolescent, you look forward to the time when you’re an adult and can make your own decisions. You are so excited about growing older that you literally count down the years until you’re 18. And then you turn 18 and everything changes. You become an adult and move out of your parents’ house. Yikes! Hey, you wanted to be “grown,” and now you are. Yet, it’s not as fun as you thought. There is a lot more to “adulting” than meets the eye. It’s definitely not for the weak of heart.

All of a sudden (so it feels) you are thrust into this cut-throat adult world, complete with bills, responsibilities, competition, heartbreak, fear, depression, and anxiety. Whoa! Wait, no one told you about all of these things. No one told you just how hard “adulting” really is. It’s right about this time you start missing home…bad. What happened to Mom’s home-cooking, or Dad’s mechanic skills when your car starts acting up.

What happened to receiving what you want from your parents almost immediately? And, where did all of these responsibilities come from?! The truth is, “adulting” is hard and scary. In fact, it’s a lot harder than you probably thought. It’s so hard that you finally started to believe what your parents told you many, many times in the past – “Slow down” and “Life sucks sometimes.” 

Is there a benefit to all this?

It would be unfair not to also point out the joys of being an adult like getting to make your own decisions and doing what you want – when you want to do it (or not do it). You no longer have to listen to anyone – unless you want to. Those things are pretty awesome; however, it still does not negate just how grueling “adulting” can be.

If you have ever wondered why adulting is so dang hard, you’ve come to the right place, because this article will provide you with reasons why adulting is so much harder than it appears. It will also give you some pointers on how you can ease the weight of finally becoming the adult you always wanted to be. Hold on tight!





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Actionable Steps


1

Read the longer version

You can learn more about “why adulting is so hard,” by reading the following articles: 5 Ways to Slowly Transition into the World of Adulting by Entity Mag, Why Is Adulting So Hard? by Success.com, 4 Reasons Why Adulting is Harder than I Thought it would Be… by My Glittery Heart, and This Is What ‘Adulting’ Means by Time.

2

You have to work more

“Adulting” comes with a boatload of responsibilities, one of which is paying bills. What does that mean for you? It means you have to work more to pay those bills – way more than you did when you lived under your parents’ roof. As an adult, you may have to work one or more full-time jobs (with overtime included, of course).
 
And, guess what? Even then that may not be enough to put gas in your tank or food on your table. The result? A lot of tears. So, what do you do? You work. But, you also make time to have some fun. Spend time with friends if your parents aren’t around. Try to create a family regardless of where you are. Yes, “adulting” involves working a steady job, but that doesn’t mean you can’t take a small amount of your hard-earned cash and buy something you’ve always wanted.
 
But, what if you don’t have much left over after you pay your bills? Try to put away $5 every pay period, so you can save up for that big item you want. Understand that it may take a while before you have the money saved up, however, once you do and you get what you have been saving for, it will show you why “adulting” isn’t so bad after all.

3

You are responsible for cleaning the house and doing the laundry

When you move out of your parents’ house and into your own residence, things that you didn’t have to think about before come bursting through the ceiling. Two of these things include cleaning the house and doing the laundry. Fun. Adults have responsibilities and guess what? Most of the time, we don’t like them or want to do them. But, we do them anyway, because that’s part of “adulting.”
 
While your Mom probably cleaned the house and did your laundry as a child, as a teen that may no longer be the case. If you are lucky and she doesn’t mind doing your laundry after you have moved out, it may still be a hassle to drive over to your parents’ house, drop off your laundry, and drive back when it’s time to pick it up. That is a lot of back-and-forth. Then you still have housecleaning to contend with. And, although your Mom may come to your rescue, I guarantee she won’t be cleaning your house as often as she cleans hers.
 
This leaves you with two choices – (1) start cleaning and washing clothes or (2) live in a filth bin. How can you manage this part of “adulting” so it doesn’t overwhelm you? By breaking your tasks into small chunks and taking breaks once or twice an hour. Maybe do some of your chores on Saturday for a few hours (with the music blasting) and some on Sunday after brunch. Make a checklist of the things you need to get done, and then check them off when you’ve completed them.

Make sure to do the chores that require immediate attention first so you can get them out of the way. Then, work on the smaller, less important tasks. Remember, organization is key when doing housework and laundry.

4

You have to keep up with your own doctor appointments

Once you become a bonafide adult, you are tasked with keeping up with your own doctor appointments. When you were younger, your parents did that for you, then reminded you to go to them.  But now that you’re a young adult, this task is left up to you. You no longer have the safety net of your parents to ensure you schedule and attend your appointments.
 
What should you do? Purchase a daily or weekly planner and write down all of your appointments – dates, times, doctors, and include office phone numbers in it. Also, set alerts on your phone so you don’t miss any of your appointments. If you have a significant other, BFF, or a parent, who can remind you of appointments, text the details to him or her – i.e. doctor’s name and the day and time of the appointment. The goal is to keep up with your doctor appointments with the least amount of hassle.

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About the Author


Dr. R. Y. Langham

Dr. R. Y. Langham

Ph.D. in Family Psychology

Ree has a Master’s in Marriage and Family Therapy (M.M.F.T.) and a Ph.D. in Family Psychology. She spent over ten years counseling families, couples, individuals, and children on adjustment issues such as blended families, same-sex couples, dysfunctional family relationships, relationship issues, etc. Now she writes for famous health organizations and is a published author.
Full Bio | LinkedIn


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